<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Ratchet x Clank Honeymoon by BobsAFloof</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24497659">Ratchet x Clank Honeymoon</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BobsAFloof/pseuds/BobsAFloof'>BobsAFloof</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Ratchet &amp; Clank</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Action/Adventure, Established Relationship, Fluff, Hijinks &amp; Shenanigans, Humor, M/M, Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 05:27:56</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,078</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24497659</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BobsAFloof/pseuds/BobsAFloof</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>2020 is shitty so far ain't it? Heres a nice clatchet honeymoon adventure to lift your spirits. After their wedding they decide to take a space cruise honeymoon, but obviously, stuff gets crazy!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Captain Qwark/Dr. Nefarious, Clank/Ratchet</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>21</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Prologue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ratchet casually brushed his fur in front of the mirror as he whistled a pleasant tune. He was at peace and bubbling with excitement at the same time. Today was the day they departed on a nice relaxing vacation with just him and Clank; their honeymoon to be specific.</p>
<p>~</p>
<p>After Clank fixed the dimensionator, they actually managed to find the lombaxes. It was such a rollercoaster. Ratchet had found out more about his dad and met all this family he never knew he had. While they were there, Ratchet and Clanks relationship became more intense. On top of that, there was a huge threat to the lombaxes they had to stop. Oh and family drama. Yeah none of that helped. </p>
<p>It was crazy, but in the end, they ended up stopping the threat in their usual fashion. Well, not so usual considering Ratchet almost, ya know, DIED. They've had their fair share of near death experiences but Ratchet apparently was legitimately on the brink of death for a minute. The lombaxes surrounded him as Clank held his body, the light on his head flickering in pure agony. He leaned his head against Ratchets, begging for him to come back. </p>
<p>And so he did. They had hugged each other tight, the lombaxes cheering. After, the lombaxes held a ceremony, damn did they know how to party too! Of course, his family wanted him to stay. It's not like he hadnt thought about that upon arrival, because he did. But after realizing how in love he was with his best friend, and how much he loved his friends and job saving worlds, he knew he couldn't stay. </p>
<p>His family was disappointed but respected his decision. He did promise to go back and visit often. They seemed satisfied with that, as long as their Ratchet was happy, that's all that mattered. Clank being the diva that he is, assumed Ratchet should want to stay and had already prepared to leave. He didnt want to make it harder than it had to be, in his mind that's what he thought anyway. He knew what was happening between them. </p>
<p>As Clank was about to use the dimensionator to leave, Ratchet had approached behind him. Clank told him to just go back, voice cracking a bit. Ratchet sighed, explaining how he made his decision. Clank had tried to argue that he could create the life he always wanted with the lombaxes. Ultimately, Ratchets argument couldnt be beat though. </p>
<p>"I've already created the best life I could possibly ask for. The one I need. The one with you." </p>
<p>Clanks eyes widened. </p>
<p>"I love you." </p>
<p>The robot was smiling so wide he thought his bolts would come loose. Ratchet leaned in close, gingerly taking the robots hands in his own as he leaned his head against his. </p>
<p>"I...love you too." Clank had responded. </p>
<p>Ratchets family was behind them, one of them whistled in approval. They both had turned around immediately, not realizing they were there. </p>
<p>"I guess your family approves." Clank commented. </p>
<p>Ratchet chuckled. "How could they not?" </p>
<p>Clank fiddled with his hands. "So um...Ratchet, does this mean we are...together? In a romantic sense? As boyfriends, if you wish to call us that?" </p>
<p>Ratchet turned to him again, giving him a big ol smooch. "Heck yeah pal." </p>
<p>Cut to a year of them dating, it was pretty evident that it wasnt too soon to tie the knot. Ratchet already apparently instinctively chose him as a mate, and lombaxes mate for life. Clank, having absolutely no issue with this and knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with him anyway, proposed. It only made sense. </p>
<p>The wedding was ginormous. Held in the lombax kingdom, all their friends were there, including the lombaxes. Talwyn couldnt stop asking them questions or exploring. Qwark was more interested in showing off, like usual. But it was hilarious when he fell in the punch bowl. </p>
<p>Clank decided a traditional lombax wedding was the best idea and Ratchet agreed. They even had a lombax priest officiate. They both wore the traditional robes, Ratchet wearing the one that his father wore on his wedding and Clank wearing one that was custom made for him by Ratchets family. Saying their I dos, the two kissed as the whole crowd cheered. Everyone danced throughout the night, it was truly a day those two would cherish forever. </p>
<p>~</p>
<p>Cut back to now, it was a few weeks after the wedding, and Clank had surprised Ratchet with tickets to a space cruise. They had just finished packing the night before, and today they were departing. </p>
<p>Ratchet sighed happily as he put down the brush. Finally they could get some alone time. Ever since the wedding nobody could seem to leave them alone. Especially Ratchets family. He was thrilled that they loved Clank so much, and he loved getting to know them and spending more time with them himself, but he was aching to have some more privacy with his new husband. </p>
<p>Ratchet kept thinking to himself as he threw on a simple black tshirt and jeans. 'After all, Clank and I havent even um...erm...gotten to...' </p>
<p>"Ratchet?" </p>
<p>Clanks voice snapped him out of his thoughts. Good, because they were going to a place they didnt need to go to right this minute. It's good he couldnt see him blushing a bit under his fur. </p>
<p>"Eh hem, uh yeah pal?" </p>
<p>"Sorry, I was just wondering if you were ready to go. Our taxi is here to take us to the cruise ship." </p>
<p>"Yeah, I'm all set." Ratchet replied as he walked out of the bedroom. He immediately noticed his husband wearing a tacky hawaiin flower shirt. </p>
<p>Ratchet tried to suppress a laugh. "So um, you're deciding to go all out huh?" </p>
<p>Clank squinted at him. "This is the appropriate vacation wear, is it not? Besides, I like it..."</p>
<p>Ratchet took his hand and kissed the back of it. "Whatever makes you happy. You do still look cute." </p>
<p>Clank smiled. "See, you like it. Now grab your suitcase and let's go." </p>
<p>As they left Ratchet responded with a laugh, "I was trying to say you look cute in anything, I wasn't complimenting the shirt!"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Trip Start!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The taxi dropped them off at the port where the gigantic space cruise ship was waiting. Everyone was lined up, the boarding about to begin. </p><p>"I guess I shouldnt be shocked that it's so crowded...this is a new cruise line right?" Ratchet commented to his husband. </p><p>Clank pointed at the ship. "Its certainly big enough. What model do you suppose it is?" </p><p>Ratchet laughed. "What is this, cruise trivia?" </p><p>Ratchet looked up at the space cruise ship. It really was huge. This was definitely a new model too, clearly designed to look as fancy as an actual cruise ship that would be on the water. </p><p>"Though you know me all too well. This baby certainly has it all, judging from the outside anyway. It's definitely a brand new model." </p><p>As Ratchet was now distracted examining the details of the vessel, Clank was scanning the crowd. It was pretty much what he expected, couples, families, older folks probably going on a retirement sort of vacation. Just then Clank squinted. </p><p>He nudged Ratchet. "Ratchet, isnt that Qwark over there?" </p><p>Ratchet looked to where Clank had pointed. Huh. It was. He appeared to be by himself, looking at a brochure. </p><p>"Yeah, it is. Guess he wanted to take a vacation...by himself. Huh." </p><p>"Perhaps he hopes to mingle among other single folk. I did see what looked like a single girls group in the crowd. Even one gentleman to choose from. Quite handsome too." </p><p>Ratchet chuckled as he looked down at him. "Quite handsome huh? Hopefully not to the standards of moi!" He put his hand to his chest for dramatic effect.</p><p>Clank chuckled too as he looked up at him lovingly. "Well, you're right. No one will be as handsome to me as you are." </p><p>They both grabbed their suitcases and, hand in hand, decided to go over to say hi to Qwark. Might as well see what he's up to. </p><p>Qwark was lost in the brochure he was reading, which was for the couples package, Ratchet noticed. Clank obviously noticed too as he gave Ratchet a curious look. </p><p>Ratchet was the first to greet him. "Hey Qwark."</p><p>Qwark fumbled with his brochure in surprise as he managed to catch it before it hit the ground. Upon seeing them he looked...rather flustered. He clearly wasnt expecting to see them there but...what was the big deal? </p><p>Qwark chuckled nervously. "Oh uh...hey guys. What are you um-" he nervously looked over his shoulder as if checking to see if someone else was coming, then looked back at them, "-doing here?" </p><p>"We're actually going on this cruise for our honeymoon." Clank replied, then glanced at Qwarks brochure again, "What are YOU doing here?" </p><p>Qwark noticed him and Ratchet both looking at it and quickly hid it behind his back, even more flustered now. He looked like he was starting to sweat too. </p><p>Ratchet grinned mischievously. "Yeah Qwark, going on a cruise all by your lonesome? Pft, why do I ask, you're totally here to mingle with all the beautiful looking single groups here!" </p><p>Qwark gulped. "Y-yeah. By myself. Alone." He was slowly backing away now. "With no one else. What so ever." </p><p>Ratchet and Clank both looked at each other knowingly. Uh huh. </p><p>"Listen I uh, gotta go get some fries from that stand over there real quick before we board, yeah that's it! Uh, see ya guys!" And with that Qwark was off in a flash. </p><p>As soon as he was gone, Ratchet burst out laughing. </p><p>"Oh that was too good. I've never seen him THAT flustered before! He was starting to sweat like he was near a volcano!" </p><p>Clank squinted at Qwark pushing his way through the crowd, clearly trying to just get away and not get fries of any sort. </p><p>"Yes, hes clearly here with someone on a couples trip like we are. But why on earth would he want to hide this from us? We of all people would never judge." </p><p>Ratchet regained his composure, wiping a tear of laughter from his eye. "Oh I dont know, maybe they're someone more famous than him and hes embarrassed." </p><p>"Maybe." Was all Clank said in response. </p><p>Just then, a large ramp extended from the space cruise ship, and the crowd drew their attention to it. A black furred lombax wearing a fancy red suit addressed the crowd. </p><p>"Good morning everyone! Welcome to the Magical Journey, the most beautiful cruise ship in the galaxy! Are you all ready to have the time of your lives?" </p><p>Ratchets mouth gaped in shock. "No way. Is that cousin Arla?" </p><p>Clank squinted at the lombax announcer. "Why, I believe it is." </p><p>She continued to speak to the crowd. "The weather is fair and the day is bright, so let's all enjoy the start of this very awesome trip!" </p><p>A couple of beefy looking lizard security guards were at her sides too. Ratchet rolled his eyes. He wouldnt be shocked if she took this job just for that perk. </p><p>The crowd excitedly began boarding up the ramp onto the ship as the lizard men guards punched their tickets. </p><p>"Please, enjoy the amenities of the ship, and dont forget to join us for the tour at 1:00 pm sharp!" She told the passengers as they passed. </p><p>Ratchet and Clank were up next now, handing their tickets to the guards. </p><p>Arlas eyes widened as she saw who they were. She beamed. </p><p>"Cousin! Isnt this a lovely surprise!" </p><p>Ratchet smiled at her. "Yeah, no kidding. Clank bought tickets to this cruise for our honeymoon. But what are you doing working as a cruise guide?" </p><p>She sighed. "Truth is, I need the money. Please dont tell aunt Viera, but, I'm planning on becoming a pilot. So in a way, this job is good experience for me too, to learn the ins and outs of ship operation. Well, some of it anyway..." </p><p>"That's...that's great! But, why dont you want to tell her?" </p><p>"Well, the school I want to go to is in your city...outside of our dimension. I'd be staying there...probably permanently, as that's where I'd find work as well. She'd never approve." </p><p>After Ratchet and Clank had first traveled to the lombax kingdom, a lot of things started to improve as the lombaxes did not want to live in fear no more. At this point pocket dimensionators were being sold at every store there. This also enabled them to travel to Ratchet as well. He never thought one might actually want to live in another dimension though. </p><p>As the two were talking, Clank thought he saw a glimpse of Qwark getting on the ship with someone else, but he couldnt tell who it was as they disappeared into the crowd. </p><p>He turned back to look at Arla. "I know this is none of our business, but you know Ratchet as well as I do, and hes going to have us sneak around to find out who Qwark is with. Do you by chance know?" </p><p>Arla scratched her chin. "Well, I'm not allowed to disclose that kind of information about our passengers to...well, anyone. Let alone other passengers." </p><p>Ratchet shrugged. "Oh well. Cant believe you even thought to ask pal..."</p><p>Clank replied, "As I said dear, I know you." </p><p>Ratchet chuckled. "Oh I never said you were wrong there." </p><p>Arla leaned down to Clank to whisper to him. </p><p>"But I will say, the person he was with was...how you say, YOUR species. If I can call you guys a specie?" </p><p>Clank looked at Ratchet, who heard that too. What? </p><p>The couple then boarded the ship along with all the other passengers. </p><p>Ratchet turned to his cousin as they walked away, "We'll talk later, but it was great to see you!" With that she waved back at them and they were on board. </p><p>Ratchet whispered to Clank as they approached the suite check in desk. "Qwark is with a robot. Why didnt he tell us he was dating one? We definitely wouldn't have judged him for that! This is juicy." </p><p>Clank rubbed his chin in thought. "Hmm...I think I have an idea of who this mystery robot may be, Ratchet. But either way, I think we best not disturb them, yes? We came here to spend time alone together, not stalk our friends." </p><p>Ratchet laughed as he took the room key from the desk clerk. </p><p>"You are in suite 205, 8th floor. Enjoy your stay." The blue fuzzy alien clerk said, in the most disinterested voice ever. </p><p>They made their way with their bags to the elevator as Ratchet responded, "Of course, don't think I forgot what we're here for. We need this. Work has been crazy as ever, family has been over, A LOT, I want to bask in this." </p><p>As they got in the elevator, Clank rubbed his arm sheepishly. </p><p>"I was actually going to talk to you about something, and I do know that we've brought this up before many times in the last year, and that, we were going to wait..."</p><p>Ratchets ears perked up. Oh. </p><p>"But, I feel that maybe we could-" </p><p>Just then they arrived at their floor, and as the door opened, they could see Qwark entering the room across from theres, with...</p><p>"Oh my god..." </p><p>They exited the elevator. </p><p>Clank sighed. Alright, yeah, this talk was definitely over for now. Shoot. Because theres no way that Ratchet would NOT shut up about this one for a while. </p><p>"Yes, as I suspected..." Clank said. </p><p>The two didnt see them as they closed the door to their room, but yeah, he was with Nefarious. </p><p>Ratchet shook his husband by the shoulders. </p><p>"CLANK HES WITH NEFARIOUS! OH MY GOD!" </p><p>Clank sighed. Here we go.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Finally, alone at last! ...oh darn it</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I just want to say, I've seen the trailer for ratchet and clank rift apart and I screamed like a school girl. I'm so excited. Story wise it looks to deliver what I've wanted for years. Now I'm aware theres a very pretty looking lombax in it, and I LOVE THEM. They are cute as hell. Yes I'm ride or die ratchet x clank but I multi ship, so if they're a love interest, you wont see any hate here! Now I wont be writing this new lombax into this fic as we dont know anything about them. So they wont exist in this. I hope you're all as excited as I am, let us prayer circle for clatchet bonding moments &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ratchet paced back and forth in their suite as Clank began to unpack. It was the honeymoon suite and had a large heart shaped bed, but luckily the room wasnt too tacky. Ratchet would have barfed if it was pink. No, it was a normal style, the bed was the only thing really romance themed. Oh, and there were massage oils and...other stuff in the bathroom. Ratchet and Clank decided not to acknowledge them for now. </p><p>Ratchet stopped to look at Clank. "Okay but, what if Nefarious is here to cause trouble? You know as well as me that that its 100 percent possible!" </p><p>Clank sighed as he finished putting the rest of their things away. "Yes I can see why you are suspicious and, I would be lying if I said I wasnt on my guard a bit now. But let us not do anything unnecessary unless we know for sure." </p><p>Ratchet sighed too, sitting down on the edge of the bed next to him. "Yeah yeah I know. You're right. So, what if they are just on a couples vacation? I mean this is crazy! How did this happen?" </p><p>Clank looked at him slyly. "Yes dear, how do these occur?" He grabbed his hand then continued, "it truly is funny how unpredictable love is." </p><p>Ratchet squeezed his hand back, smiling wide. "And you know what, I'm so glad it is." </p><p>The two faced each other now on the bed. Apparently Clank was capable of gulping because he did right then and there. Well this wasnt exactly how he would have planned...this to happen. But maybe this could be the time to discuss it?</p><p>It's not that he was in a hurry. Or that it was so so important that it was a deal breaker. They HAVE discussed it. They both did want it. They had healthy communication on this. Clank just knew he was ready now. It was truly...exhilarating. </p><p>"Clank, I love you so much. To the stars and back. I know I already said that at our wedding but, hey, why not rehash that?" </p><p>Clank chuckled. "I love you too. A great amount. I never thought it could be possible for something so great to occur for me...I'm glad I fell out of the sky and 'into your lap' as you tell it." </p><p>Ratchet laughed. "Hey, it's true. And I'm glad you did too. I didnt think I could be this happy. Let's have a good honeymoon, kay pal?" </p><p>Clank took both of his hands in his now. Ok, discussion time. THIS discussion, anyway. </p><p>"Ratchet...as I was saying in the elevator...I wanted to talk to you about..." </p><p>Ratchets ear flicked and he was blushing under his fur again. Whoa. </p><p>"You mean you...want to...?"</p><p>Clank shuffled a bit closer to him now. "I've been thinking about it...a lot more lately. And I've already decided, I am ready. 120 percent ready, to exaggerate." </p><p>Ratchet was going to die right then and there. Okay, this was crazy, were they really going to finally...? </p><p>So much for not acknowledging the stuff in the bathroom. As Ratchet was about to nod his head like a crack addict on caffeine at the same time as said crack and jump off the bed to grab a very special product from the bathroom, there was a knock on their door. </p><p>Ratchet winced at the knock and his ears flattened. He glared at the door angrily, then looked back at Clank. He grinned, but...in a clearly irritated way. </p><p>"Clank...if one of us is going to answer the door, I think it shouldnt be me right now because...Im OBVIOUS" he said through gritted teeth. </p><p>Clank was about to question what on earth he was talking about, but quickly noticed what he was talking about and jumped off the bed, clearing his throat. </p><p>Whoever it was kept knocking, so Clank knew he better answer. He wasnt too happy about this interruption either of course. Who could even be...? </p><p>Qwark was at the door, fidgeting. </p><p>"Uh hey again, guys...I wasnt interrupting anything, was I?" </p><p>Ratchet glared daggers at him as he didnt take his folded hands off his lap. </p><p>"Oh yeah no. No. It's not like it's our HONEYMOON or anything." </p><p>Qwark sighed. "I know I know, I'm really sorry guys! But I just needed to come clean to you about what I'm really doing here. Uh, you did see us when you came off the elevator, right? And I'm not accidentally revealing this to you now or anything?" </p><p>Clank sighed, rubbing in between his eyes. "Yes. We did see you with Nefarious. I'm assuming you two are an item now?" </p><p>Ratchet hopped off the bed, the 'obvious' calmed down now. Still was NOT happy. </p><p>"Yeah, or are you involved in one of his evil schemes? Please tell me THAT isnt the case. Because I think we've had enough getting in our way now." </p><p>Qwark looked defeated. "Listen guys, I dont know how it happened! He just turned out to be...so charming! Almost up to MY level of charming! And THATS an impressive feat!" </p><p>Ratchet raised his brow. "Soooo couple or coaxed into evil scheme?" </p><p>Qwark looked at his feet as he mumbled, "couple...in the romantic sense, of course." </p><p>Ratchet sighed in relief. See, this would have been entertaining at a DIFFERENT time. But even then, he'd feel a bit bad for teasing Qwark too much. They really wouldnt judge, you know. Well, okay, Nefarious was kind of a different story. They had to be a little on edge about that. Considering his career aspects. </p><p>"Well, we promise to not disturb you two. Thank you for telling us." Clank said. </p><p>"Yes, PLEASE do not disturb us at our HONEYMOON SUITE." Ratchet reiterated. </p><p>Qwark looked up from his feet, smiling. "So you guys arent mad? I mean it IS Nefarious but, I swear hes changed! You just need to get to know him like I have! I mean as you know, I do have awesome tastes." He said that last part with a cocky grin. </p><p>Ratchet sighed. "Yeah alright, but..." </p><p>Clank stopped his husband, speaking for him. "Just be careful. And if there is any issues, speak to one of the ships security officers." </p><p>Ratchet was relieved that Clank didnt say 'to us' because it really was hard for them to get out of their usual hero mindset and just be a relaxed couple for a few weeks. Ratchet decided that he wasnt going to let himself get distracted by hero thoughts anymore for the duration of this vacation. Other thoughts, however...</p><p>Qwark saluted as he backed away from their door. "I promise, you guys have nothing to worry about! Hey, you should come hang out with us later at the gambling tables, see what I'm talking about! You'll love him! Well, as much as you can anyway. Bye guys!" </p><p>Clank closed the door, sighing. "Well that was annoying." </p><p>Ratchet laughed, falling back onto the bed. "Man, we really cant catch a break sometimes, can we?" </p><p>Clank suddenly grabbed one of Ratchets socks from the drawer they were packed in, quickly opened the door, tied it to the handle, then shut it and locked it. </p><p>Ratchet sat up, ears perked. "Wow you really ARE ready." </p><p>Clank smiled. "I am not one to lie Ratchet. You know that." </p><p>Ratchet smiled too. "Yep, knew THAT from the very start!" </p><p>Clank looked towards the bathroom. </p><p>"Would you like me to go grab the-" </p><p>"Go for it." Ratchet interrupted. </p><p>~</p><p>Later on, Ratchet was whistling an extremely happy tune, almost feeling like skipping as Clank and him made their way to the casino area of the ship. Clanks green eyes were shining bright, a wide smile on his face. Needless to say, they were feeling as chipper as a june bug on a summer day now! </p><p>"You know Clank, I'm not much of a gambler." </p><p>Clank glanced at him coily as they continued walking. "I must say, after earlier I do question that now slightly. In a good way, of course." </p><p>Ratchet laughed. "Well I am full of surprises!" </p><p>"Indeed." </p><p>"I mean, so are you though. I didnt expect you to do upgrades just for that!"</p><p>Clank smiled at him. "I wanted it to be a surprise!" </p><p>"Oh, no worries, I love surprises! More than once too, I promise it won't be any less surprising!" </p><p>Clank lightly smacked his husbands arm. "Alright alright, I'm as joyful as you are right now, but let's both get our heads out of the gutter for now, hm?" </p><p>Once they made it to the casino area, which was incredibly massive and packed with a loud, bustling crowd of people gambling and having a good time, they looked around, taking in the sight. </p><p>"Wow. Speaking of full of surprises. This ship! This is super cool." </p><p>Clank nodded. "I must admit, it is quite impressive. Shall we look for Qwark and Nefarious? He did say they'd be here at this time." </p><p>Ratchet rubbed the back of his head. "Yeah I guess so. To be honest, I want to see this...new and improved Nefarious. Which I frankly find very hard to believe."</p><p>"Well, we will have to give him the benefit of the doubt for now." Clank pointed over to the bar, where the aforementioned couple were sitting. "I see them over there." </p><p>Ratchet sighed. "Alright, let's go check this out."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. The "new" Nefarious</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ratchet and Clank made their way over to Qwark and Nefarious sitting at the bar. So much for the gambling tables. Ratchet would much rather have a drink first anyway, he was thinking. A nice mimosa. Mmmm. </p>
<p>They both sat down beside them. Nefarious was wearing a tshirt with a kitten face on it, probably from one of the shops on the ship. That or Qwark got it for him. Ratchet wanted to laugh at it, but Clank shot him the typical look that said 'be polite you furry cretin.' </p>
<p>"Hello Qwark, Nefarious." Clank greeted first. </p>
<p>The couple turned to them, Qwark beaming at them. Nefarious was a little hard to read. He always looked mischievous, now was no exception. Though, he also looked tense when he looked at the two of them. Interesting. </p>
<p>"Ratchet, Clank! For a second I thought you wouldnt join us!" Qwark exclaimed. </p>
<p>Nefarious squinted at Ratchet specifically. "Hello squishy. Been a while hasnt it?" </p>
<p>Ratchets amusement about Nefarious's shirt seemed to have faded as a slight bit of anger began to radiate off him now. </p>
<p>"Nefarious." Was all Ratchet said in acknowledgement. </p>
<p>Qwark fidgeted, his nervousness from before coming back. Clank sighed. This immediately was becoming a disaster. </p>
<p>"So, why dont you tell us what's been going on. It's not like we weren't going to address the elephant in the room. What has changed for you, Nefarious?" Clank asked. </p>
<p>Nefarious relaxed a little more, facing Clank. Still did not have good feelings towards Ratchet, which the lombax duly noted. The feeling was mutual. He doubted he resented Qwark for being a "squishy" if he was dating him. Nope, Ratchet was sure he just specifically hated him. Good, let Clank do the talking. </p>
<p>"Hey bartender, a mimosa over here please!" Ratchet told the bartender, who was currently wiping out a glass. He was a weird squid looking alien, but only had two tentacles for arms and two for legs, and more tentacles for hair. The squid bartender nodded as he prepared Ratchets drink. </p>
<p>If Ratchet was going to deal with this, he would definitely need a drink. </p>
<p>"I'm retired from villain work, officially. So yes, I HAVE turned over a new leaf, whether you want to believe it or not. You can thank your very handsome friend here for that." He said that last part while glancing at Qwark affectionately. </p>
<p>Well, Qwark certainly looked very happy. And Clank could have sworn he did see genuine affection when Nefarious looked at his partner. Ratchet was not paying attention at this point, now taking his drink from the bartender, swigging it down. </p>
<p>Clank lightly hit Ratchet on the arm. "Slow down." </p>
<p>Ratchet put his drink down, turning back to the group. </p>
<p>"So let me get this straight. Qwark here has just, completely changed you? Is that what you're saying?" Asked the lombax. </p>
<p>Nefarious nodded firmly as he crossed his arms. "Yes, that's right. No tricks here. I am done for life." </p>
<p>Ratchet took another sip from his drink. "Uh huh..." </p>
<p>Nefarious grabbed Qwarks hand. "I'll do anything for him, honestly. It's a long story that I simply do not feel like gracing you with right now." </p>
<p>Ratchet was studying him at this point. He seemed to be noticing the same energy that Clank was feeling that Nefarious has towards Qwark as the lombax relaxed a bit. Was still definitely suspicious though. </p>
<p>"Well, it's definitely a story I wanna hear. I'm sure Qwark will spill the beans, you know how much he loves talking." </p>
<p>Qwark waved his hand dismissively. "Pft, you guys just love hearing my exemplary story telling. I cant blame ya! Tell ya what, I'll tell you the whole story later! For now, why dont we go over to the gambling tables and have a bit of fun! Hm?" </p>
<p>The group made their way over to one of the tables. The dealer was an alien with a fish head, the rest of him just a scaley humanoid. The cards were go fish cards that youd be able to get in the toy section of a department store. </p>
<p>Clank squinted. "Sir, what game is played at this table?"</p>
<p>The fish man answered with a blubbery voice, "Go fish." </p>
<p>Ratchet was grinning ear to ear. "This I will gamble with!" </p>
<p>Clank shook his head. Unbelievable. </p>
<p>Nefarious and Qwark sat down across from them. </p>
<p>"Who's in?" Asked the dealer. </p>
<p>"I'll just watch thank you..." said Clank. </p>
<p>Ratchet slapped a hand down on the table. "Definitely in. How could I not? Its freaking go fish!" </p>
<p>Nefarious huffed. "Then I'm in too. I'm not missing out on the fun." He said that last part with a hint of mischief in his voice. </p>
<p>Qwark nodded enthusiastically. "I will! Uhhh how do you play this one again?" </p>
<p>After the dealer dealt out all the cards, he just sat there in the chair he had and pulled out an action novel. What was the point of having a go fish dealer again? </p>
<p>"For each game you win, the more money you win, simple. Ok enjoy." He said, not looking up from his book. </p>
<p>Clank was in disbelief at how incredibly ridiculous this was but refrained from saying anything. At the same time he supposed he shouldnt be shocked. </p>
<p>Nefarious patiently took the time to explain the game to Qwark. That took Ratchet by surprise. Guess Qwark had the robot hook line and sinker and not the other way around after all. Which was not a bad thing. </p>
<p>Still, that didnt mean Ratchet was going to completely let down his guard with Nefarious. How could he, when this robot had done countless evil deeds? At least this wasnt Tachyon. That Ratchet would have not been able to stomach. </p>
<p>As they played on, Nefarious spoke up again. </p>
<p>"So, you and Clank are married now? I suppose I'm not surprised, you two definitely had serious romantic tension everytime I dealt with you..." </p>
<p>Ratchet glared at Nefarious. "And you're still not going to tell us how you and Qwark happened?" </p>
<p>Nefarious looked back at his cards, a little flustered. "As I SAID, it's a LONG STORY. Bah! Let's just play!" </p>
<p>Ratchet had finished off 3 mimosas at this point. Clank was glad this was all covered in the trip. </p>
<p>"Okay, that's enough. Dont bring him any more." Clank said to the waiter who was serving the drinks. </p>
<p>Ratchet was definitely drunk. "N-no wait, its fineeeee I'm GOOOD! Just ONE MOREEE!" </p>
<p>The waiter nodded at Clank and ignored Ratchet as he walked off. </p>
<p>Ratchet drunkenly reached a hand out in the waiters direction. "Nooooooooo..." his face then slammed down on the table. </p>
<p>"Wow. Light weight much..." Nefarious mumbled, clearly enjoying this a little. </p>
<p>Ratchet looked up at him. "Ok ok listen just," he grabbed his cards again, "do you have any 5s?" </p>
<p>Nefarious shook his head. "Go fish." </p>
<p>Ratchet went 'pft' as he picked up another card. The "dealer" was asleep at this point. Clank was almost feeling the same way but now he had to keep an eye on his husband. </p>
<p>More minutes passed, and the game was almost done. Ratchet was barely playing anymore. </p>
<p>"So like, how can you be totally not evil now? Like you dont just not become not evil like...I get it, you are in love with Qwark, I can seeee it..." Ratchet drawled. </p>
<p>Clank side eyed his husband. "I cant believe I almost comprehended that sentence." </p>
<p>Nefarious flustered again at the last part of Ratchets comment. Qwark luckily did not hear it as he was too focused on his cards. </p>
<p>Nefarious leaned across the table to Ratchet and whispered, "Shut UP you squishy fool! I haven't told him that yet!" </p>
<p>Ratchet tilted his head, his ears flopping to the side. "Huh you really have changed. I cant believe this. Qwark of all people could do this, huh? Well guess what? I'm sorry for being so tense around you, but you should understand that!" </p>
<p>Ratchet was now leaning across the table too, pointing an accusing finger at Nefarious. </p>
<p>"You're drunk. So just shut it!" Nefarious snapped. </p>
<p>"And you're a bad guy! The villain! We arent gonna trust you just like that! This is weird as all hell! You're changed, it's pretty clear, but also, its YOU! I'm soooo confuseddd..." Ratchet said as he leaned back again. </p>
<p>Nefarious threw his hands in the air, standing up from the table. "Ugh! I'm going back to our room! You're just as annoying as ever!" And with that he stomped off. </p>
<p>It took a second for Qwark to notice but he threw down his cards and ran after his lover. "Hey wait!" </p>
<p>Clank sighed, shaking his head. Well this went over well. </p>
<p>The dealer woke up with a snort. "Huh what. Who won." </p>
<p>Clank looked at him. "No one. The games over." </p>
<p>"Ratchet maybe we should-" </p>
<p>As he said that and turned to where Ratchet WAS sitting, he noticed he was now in fact, gone. </p>
<p>Clank stood up in a panic. "Ratchet? Ratchet?!?!" </p>
<p>He looked around the room. He couldnt see him anywhere. Did he really just have 3 drinks? Maybe it was more, when he wasnt looking. Dammit. </p>
<p>"I certainly did not plan to go husband hunting on my own honeymoon, yet here we are..."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>uh oh</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Strange goings on</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Back in Qwark and Nefarious's room, the previously evil robot was sulking. Why did they have to encounter those two of all places? Especially that furry cretin! Gah! This was supposed to be time just to themselves, Qwark could have at least chosen not to introduce them. </p>
<p>He looked over at his boyfriend, who was watching some kind of soap opera on their room's TV. He looked completely engrossed as his jaw hung agape at the current scene. Nefarious couldn't be bothered to know what it was. But he did smile as he looked at him. No, Qwark wanting everyone to be friends was definitely something he would do. </p>
<p>Nefarious sighed. Well, he would have to apologize to that lombax just to make Qwark happy. Believe him, he wouldn't do it otherwise. The prior evil mastermind was changing a lot of things just for this buffoon. This adorable, adorable buffoon. </p>
<p>How long had it been since he concocted an evil scheme? It was tempting sometimes. Okay, not sometimes, more like, all the time. But he wasn't going to. Well, he was going to continue to try not to. It's not like the past plans have worked (thanks to that STUPID squishy), so maybe it was for the best. Either way for Qwark, he needed to redeem himself. </p>
<p>Without taking his eyes off the TV, Qwark spoke to his lover, "hey, are ya gonna come watch this with me? It's just starting to get good! Eveleen just found out Derek is Dave's evil twin! Who knew right?" </p>
<p>Nefarious sighed as he went to go sit beside him on the bed, then let his head fall into Qwark's lap. Qwark looked down at him with a smile. </p>
<p>"Awww come on, cheer up! We can try hanging out with them again tomorrow! You know, when Ratchet is uh...sober." </p>
<p>Nefarious grumbled. "That darn squishy is the bane of my existence. I know you mean well, but he will never not be the bane of my existence, so your efforts to make us friends are going to be futile!" </p>
<p>Qwark rolled his eyes. "Oh dont be such a grump. You two could get along if you just tried." </p>
<p>The robot grumbled in defiance some more, not saying a word. For now, he would just sulk right here where he was. At least it was the best spot in the world. </p>
<p>~</p>
<p>The entertainment area of the ship was almost completely empty, as most cruise goers were in bed by now. Clank looked at the clock on the wall. 3 am. He sighed. Well, looks like charging his batteries would have to wait. </p>
<p>He walked out of the gambling area and into a hall with elevators. </p>
<p>"Ratchet?" He called out quietly.</p>
<p>No sigh of him here. But ah! He noticed something on the floor, bending down to pick it up. It was a hunk of beige colored fur. He analyzed it. Yep, that was his husband's. So he did meander off this way.</p>
<p>Clank continued until he was in what looked like a food court area of the ship. It was also empty and dark, only dimly lit, so it was hard to see if Ratchet was in here. </p>
<p>Just then he heard his drunken singing voice, </p>
<p>"I FLY LIKE PAPER GET HIGH LIKE PLANES!~"</p>
<p>The robot sighed. Oh boy. He wandered over to where he heard his singing and saw him on top of the stone fountain in the middle of the food court, which had water coming out of the statue shaped like an alien whale creature he didn't recognize. He was hanging off the side of it, swaying. </p>
<p>Ratchet, very wobbly, looked down to see Clank. </p>
<p>"Oh pal! Heyyyyy! Isn't this place the coolest? God I just- I love this ship." </p>
<p>"Ratchet…get down." Clank simply stated. </p>
<p>Ratchet pouted. "But I'm high like a plane. Like that awesome song I heard on the radio. You should. You shoulddd totallyyyy come up here with meeee pallllll." </p>
<p>Clank shook his head. "Ratchet, its 3 AM. Everyone is trying to sleep. And your behaviour was not at it's best tonight with Nefarious." </p>
<p>Ratchet snickered. "Its not like he was always on his 'best behaviour' ever now was he?"</p>
<p>The robot put his hands on his hips, giving the lombax his signature 'you're going to be in trouble if you dont bloody get down here now' look. </p>
<p>Sighing the lombax was about to climb down, until he slipped and fell into the fountain, leaving him sitting there soaking wet. </p>
<p>Hands still on his hips, Clank leaned over him at the side of the fountain. </p>
<p>"I'd say you have learned your lesson." </p>
<p>Clank helped Ratchet back up to their room and got him dried off before laying him to bed. As he put the blanket over him and was about to walk off, his husband reached out grabby hands to him. </p>
<p>"Noooo come backkkk! We can have some good old fashioned family fun!" He said that last part with a wink. </p>
<p>Clank turned to look at him again with his stern face. "Ratchet, you are drunk. You need to get a good night's sleep. I will join you in a bit." </p>
<p>Falling back into the bed, Ratchet grumbled, "fiiinnneee…" </p>
<p>He couldn't help but chuckle a little. Ratchet never got drunk so he wasn't mad at him or anything, he knew he was just stressed out being around Nefarious. He couldn't blame him, but for now the lombax needed to rest. He always would make sure he was taken care of, even when Ratchet was defiant about it. </p>
<p>Clank was about to get ready to head to bed himself, when he heard voices arguing outside their bedroom door. He wouldn't be shocked if Qwark and Nefarious were having an argument after tonight, but upon getting closer to the door, he realized it wasn't their voices. These voices were deep and gravelly, almost beastly. </p>
<p>Curious, Clank gently slipped out of their room, leaving a now passed out Ratchet snoring peacefully. He would be fine. He was just gonna go check it out for a second. </p>
<p>When he got out, no one was there. Turning to look at the corner leading to a hall with other rooms, he noticed a couple shadows of beastly looking figures silhouetted against the wall. The voices were coming from there. </p>
<p>Carefully, he snuck to the corner, peering around. Two lizard men were standing there, clearly having a debate about something. </p>
<p>"We need to get this plan set in motion now, or its never going down!"</p>
<p>The other lizard scoffed. "Relax, I've got it all figured out. Tomorrow night we will meet in the boiler room and we'll be well on our way. Capiche?" </p>
<p>His partner mumbled an agreement of "fine" before the two of them began making their way in Clanks direction. </p>
<p>The robot quickly ran back into their room, closing the door just enough so he could watch the lizard men enter the elevator. After they were gone he closed and locked their door. </p>
<p>"Hmm…" Clank wondered, "what was that about?" </p>
<p>He looked over to his husband, smiling at how peaceful he looked. He'll talk to him about it in the morning. </p>
<p>~</p>
<p>Meanwhile, Ratchets cousin, Arla, was just getting up, as it was now 5 am and time to prepare for her guide duties of the day. She yawned as she drank her coffee, careful not to spill any on her suit. After finishing, she made her way to the security room to talk to one of her security buddies.</p>
<p>She knocked on the door. "Hammond? You there? I didn't bring you a breakfast sandwich this time, but seeing me should be all you need to start your day anyway, right?" She said that last part teasingly. </p>
<p>No answer. Weird, he was usually here at this time while Joe was finishing overnight patrol. She tried the knob. Yep, it was open. </p>
<p>It was a a fairly small and cramped security room, though it did primarily belong to Joe and Hammond. There were more rooms for other security on the ship too. Sadly though, nobody was here. </p>
<p>"Huh, that's bizarre." She muttered to herself as she looked around. </p>
<p>Looking at his desk though, she noticed a paper that looked like a diagram for a strange device. </p>
<p>"What is this?" </p>
<p>She wasn't sure what it was a diagram for exactly, but she could have sworn it looked strangely like a bomb. </p>
<p>Why did Hammond have this? </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Fun honeymoon activity: tailing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The next morning, Ratchet awoke, groaning. His head was pounding and he immediately regretted everything. Why did he go so crazy last night? Then guilt overflowed him on top of that. Poor Clank. He did remember that part. His husband taking care of him. </p><p>He really needed to make it up to him...and never drink like that again. </p><p>Sluggishly, the lombax got out of bed, heading to the bathroom to change and brush his teeth. Just a simple periwinkle shirt and shorts for today. When he came back out, a silver tray of eggs, bacon, and toast awaited him on the bed, along with Clank, who was sitting there patiently. </p><p>"I thought I would take the liberty of ordering you some room service. Not quite as romantic as having me cook it, I suppose, but it's the next best thing." Said the robot. </p><p>Ratchet smiled, sitting down next to him on the bed, then putting the tray on his lap. He turned to Clank, giving him a quick peck on the cheek before digging in.</p><p>As he ate, he spoke, "thanks a lot pal. And I'm sorry for last night. I'm never doing THAT again." </p><p>Clank chuckled. "It is alright dear. You rarely ever do that. In fact, I dont think you've ever done that. It would have been entertaining if I didn't have to babysit you." </p><p>Ratchet rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment. "Yeah that couldn't have been fun for you, I'm sorry. Again." </p><p>His husband stroked his arm soothingly. "And again, you don't have to apologize." </p><p>Ratchets hand flew to his head as he felt another wave of pain. Clank shook his head. </p><p>"And there is your consequence. Eat your breakfast and drink plenty of water. I'll be watching you to make sure you do. It dehydrates you quite a bit." </p><p>Ratchet let out a strained laugh. "Yeah yeah I know. Maybe I should be more worried about you rather than the headache." </p><p>Clank scoffed. "Oh please Ratchet. You know I am correct." </p><p>The robot got off the bed as his husband continued to eat. </p><p>"By the way, I saw something quite suspicious last night." </p><p>The lombax looked up at him, mouth full of bacon. </p><p>"What?" </p><p>"Well, I heard a heated discussion going on in the hall, and curiosity seemed to have gotten the better of me, so I snuck out to go see what was going on." </p><p>Ratchet put down his piece of toast. "And?" </p><p>Clank crossed his arms, serious in thought. "Well it looked like two lizard men. I only looked quickly but I'm almost positive. And the discussion did not sound friendly." </p><p>Ratchet put his tray to the side, already having finished his food. He hummed thoughtfully. </p><p>"Maybe it was just some kind of dispute between family members. Or something. Wait, didnt Arla have two lizard men body guards? What if it was them?" </p><p>Clank began pacing as he was deep in thought. "Perhaps. Maybe we should pay your cousin a visit. Do you know where she might be on the ship?" </p><p>The lombax shook his head as he got off the bed. "I don't know. I didnt even know she was working here. She's a guide so she could be anywhere. I'm up for a walk around the ship if you are." </p><p>Ratchet stretched and yawned. He still looked dead exhausted from his little excursion last night. Clank hoped his breakfast perked him up a little bit. </p><p>The robot took his husband's hand. "Yes, we are on our honeymoon after all. Let's not make this stressful and just enjoy ourselves. We promised we would."</p><p>Ratchet chuckled. "Hey, spying on lizard men sounds like fun. Is that not enjoying ourselves?" </p><p>"I suppose for you it is entertaining, but I'm mostly just curious. Let's go see if we can find your cousin." </p><p>The couple left their room, taking the elevator down to the main floor of the ship. Everything was much busier than it was last night. Everyone was out and about, enjoying the amenities of the ship. When they walked through the food court again, they noticed that was definitely the most packed. Room service, restaurants, and a food court? This cruise ship really had it all. </p><p>Ratchet pointed at a hotdog place excitedly. "Oh oh! I want a hot dog lunch! Hot dog lunch!" </p><p>"Ratchet, I'm sure I have asked this before but, why do organics love hot dogs so much?" </p><p>Before Ratchet could retort with something surely witty, he noticed Arlas guards, who were clearly not currently with her at the moment. They were looking awful suspicious as they snuck around the corner. </p><p>The lombax leaned down to whisper to his hubby, "hey, I think I saw those lizard guys go around that corner over there. And they were looking over their shoulders the whole time." </p><p>Clank looked to wear he was pointing. "Did you want to go investigate? Your cousin could be in trouble after all." </p><p>Ratchet looked back at the hot dog stand, then to the corner the lizard men went around, sighing. </p><p>"Well this WAS supposed to be a vacation...we're not following those rules, are we pal?" </p><p>Clank laughed. "Well, I suppose we just cant keep away. I bet you made a promise to yourself not to be all heroic on this trip, didnt you?" </p><p>Ratchet smiled. He knew him all too well. As he should.</p><p>"Well, so did I. But this is your cousin we're talking about. We should at least confirm that she's alright." </p><p>The lombax sighed. He was right, of course. Okay, time to be temporarily heroic. </p><p>"Let's go." </p><p>The two of them snuck carefully around the corner. Obviously, the lizard men weren't in the hallway anymore.</p><p>"Well, what now?" Asked Ratchet. </p><p>Just then, Arla rushed into the hall, almost bumping into them. </p><p>"Whoa, Arla! You okay? What's going on?" </p><p>The charcoal furred lombax ran her hands through her hair floof anxiously. </p><p>"Well i-i-i dont know I just- I found something on Hammonds desk and its-" </p><p>Ratchet took the paper she had from her hand. It was that diagram. </p><p>"What's this?"</p><p>Clank squinted at it as his husband showed it to him. </p><p>"Interesting. This looks like the workings of a very powerful explosive." </p><p>Arla looked panicked. "So it is a bomb?" </p><p>"Now hang on a second, we dont know-" Ratchet began.</p><p>Clank cut him off, "-Ratchet I can very much confirm what we're seeing is a bomb." </p><p>Arlas eyes were wide with shock. "I-I think I need to lie down..." </p><p>Ratchet put his hand on her shoulder. "Arla, it's okay. We'll figure this out." </p><p>"But- you guys are on your honeymoon! You shouldn't get involved in this! No, I need to figure this out." </p><p>"No man is an island," Clank stated, looking at her with sympathy, "we are family. We are meant to help each other out." </p><p>Ratchet nodded. "Yeah, exactly. We promise we won't go overboard." </p><p>She looked at the two of them, ears drooping and feeling guilty. She felt responsible for this considering she had trusted Joe and Hammond completely. Now, she had no idea what to think. </p><p>Sighing, she looked down at the floor in defeat. "Okay." <br/>As the three of them walked together down the hall, they discussed what their next course of action should be. </p><p>"I mean, we could just tell the other security on the ship or contact head of security to report this, couldn't we?" Ratchet inquired. </p><p>Arla sighed. "I don't know. I don't even know if I can trust them at this point. What if this goes higher?"</p><p>"She could very well be right, Ratchet."</p><p>Ratchet rolled his eyes. "Geez pal, what kind of a honeymoon cruise did we end up picking here? We end up wanting a break from hero work and it still follows us everywhere!" </p><p>His cousin sighed again. "I'm so sorry guys..."</p><p>"Dont be. None of this is your fault." Said Clank. </p><p>As they entered the hall where the security room was, they saw the two lizard men in question exit the room, talking to each other. The group quickly hid back around the corner, watching them. </p><p>"So, remember, the boiler room tonight at 11 PM, got it?" Said Joe to Hammond.</p><p>Hammond waved his claw at him dismissively. "Yeah yeah sure thing, got it." </p><p>"And we gotta finish building it tonight, or else-"</p><p>"-relax Joe! For galaxies sake would you just calm down? It's getting done! This will work, I'm sure of it." </p><p>Joe scoffed. "It better. We've worked so hard to make this come together. We ain't stopping now. No chickening out." </p><p>"See ya tonight at 11 then, boiler room." Joe said as he left Hammond with a wave. </p><p>"Yep, see ya." Hammond responded, waving back. </p><p>The two then went their separate ways as Joe went in the opposite direction and Hammond was coming their way. </p><p>Arla balled her fists. "I gotta talk to him. This cant be right."</p><p>Ratchet stopped her, putting his hand on her shoulder. "Wait. If you confront him like this he'll know you were spying on them, and that could end very badly." </p><p>"But!-" </p><p>Before he could see them, they lead Arla away, running back the way they came. They hid around the next corner as Hammond walked past, and luckily he didnt seem to notice them. He went into the elevator. </p><p>Arla put her head in her hands. </p><p>"Ugh I just...I don't know what to do."</p><p>Ratchet glanced at his husband mischievously. "You thinking what I'm thinking?"</p><p>Clank nodded. "I'm thinking we need to be in that boiler room tonight." </p><p>"Uh yeah, that's totally what I was thinking, definitely not anything we could do in that janitors closet over there..."</p><p>Clank lightly smacked his arm. "Ratchet!" </p><p>Ratchet chuckled. "But yeah, we should check it out." </p><p>Arla stepped away from the two of them, rubbing her arm. She turned to look at them, determination in her eyes. </p><p>"No. You guys are here for your honeymoon. You should be enjoying yourselves. Let me handle this. I promise I will do this right." </p><p>They both looked at her with concern. </p><p>"But-" Ratchet started.</p><p>She put up her hand, silencing him. "No. I've made up my mind. You two go relax. But, listen..."</p><p>She grabbed a walkie from her pocket and handed it to Ratchet.</p><p>"Keep this with you. I've got my own. If I need back up, last resort, I'll contact you for help. Okay?" </p><p>Ratchet gripped the walkie, looking at her, nodding. <br/>"Alright. Just...be careful."</p><p>"And try not to let your emotions take hold. It may put you in danger." Added Clank. </p><p>She saluted them as she headed off. "Dont worry guys, I'll be alright!"</p><p>Ratchet looked at his husband. "I dont know about this."</p><p>"Well, we have the communication device. If there is a problem, I'm sure she'll let us know."</p><p>Ratchet looked at the janitors closet again, then back at Clank. "So...?"</p><p>"Oh for heavens sakes Ratchet, we are not going in a janitors closet to-!" </p><p>Just then, the whole ship experienced turbulence as everything shook. It knocked the two of them to the ground. Ratchet helped up his husband.</p><p>"You okay pal?"</p><p>"Yes. What was that?" </p><p>Ratchet looked around. "I don't know. You don't think it could be that bomb already?" </p><p>"I dont see how that could cause the whole ship to rock. It looked like a powerful explosive but not that powerful. Besides, they said they needed to finish building it. Let's get back to the food court for now. Perhaps we can get that hot dog for you while we're at it."</p><p>Ratchet grinned, eyes sparkling. "I see no issue there!"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Turbulence of the heart. Also literally</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Le Chocolat de Fromage has a 5 star rating. But the cheesecake WILL upset your stomach.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Later that night, Nefarious decided to take Qwark to one of the ships fancy restaurants rather than the food court. Not that the food court wouldn't be romantic but, he'd rather it be quiet. Besides, they deserved the privacy. He was going to leave it as a surprise for Qwark, so he had his boyfriend blindfolded as he led him by hand to the restaurant. </p>
<p>"C'mon you wont even give me a hint about where you're taking me?" Qwark asked as he let Nefarious lead him. </p>
<p>"Now now dear, it wouldn't be a surprise if I gave you any hints now would it?" </p>
<p>Ratchet and Clank walked past them, stopping to look at them in confusion, the lombax munching on his hot dog. Obviously Qwark wouldn't have noticed, but Nefarious didnt see them either as he finally lead him into the restaraunt, called Le Chocolat de Fromage. </p>
<p>"What do you think Nefarious is up to?" Ratchet asked, hot dog crumbs falling from his mouth. </p>
<p>"I'd wager hes just trying to surprise Qwark with a fancy dinner date. Perhaps we could go later just to check it out." </p>
<p>Ratchet shrugged. "Meh, you know I've never been that big a fan of that fancy stuff. But I am kinda curious just by the name of it alone, not gonna lie." </p>
<p>Clank hummed to himself in thought. </p>
<p>The lombax looked down at his husband curiously. "What are you thinking about now?" </p>
<p>"The turbulence that just happened. Arent you still wondering what that was?" </p>
<p>"Well, it's been 10 minutes and we havent felt anything else." </p>
<p>Clank nodded. "True. But I'd like to inquire about it." </p>
<p>"Pal, I'm sure the captain would let us know if there was danger, they'd let all the passengers know." </p>
<p>The walkie in Ratchets pocket spoke up then. </p>
<p>"Hey you guys, its Arla. Do you read?" </p>
<p>Ratchet grabbed the walkie from his pocket, responding. "Yeah, read you loud and clear. Are you in trouble? What's going on?" </p>
<p>Arla chuckled lightly at the other end of the line. "Its a false alarm guys. I'll explain it all later." </p>
<p>Clank squinted suspiciously. "But that clearly was a bomb." </p>
<p>"Yeah, it is, but it's not what you think. Let's meet up right away at the bar." </p>
<p>"Alright, we'll head there right now. Later." </p>
<p>Ratchet put the walkie back in his pocket. </p>
<p>"Well pal, you heard her. Let's go see what she has to say." </p>
<p>Clank rubbed his chin, still thinking. "Itll be interesting to see why they were setting up a bomb." </p>
<p>As the two headed off to go back to the bar, we cut to Qwark and Nefarious in the restaurant. </p>
<p>"Alright, sit down. Andddd voila!" </p>
<p>Nefarious took off his blind fold. Qwark looked around to see the fancy setting before him, having been seated at a table for two, his boyfriend sitting across from him, looking at him expectantly. </p>
<p>"A fancy shmancy restaurant? This IS unexpected. You never take me to those. But then again, it's not like we've ever been on a cruise before either." </p>
<p>Nefarious chuckled nervously. "Well I'm trying to get more accustomed with squishy courting, and I feel like I'm making progress...right?" </p>
<p>Qwark laughed. "Of course! I love this! I love all of this! You're more romantic than you think, eh?" </p>
<p>"That's certainly the plan. If it makes you happy, it makes me happy. Now, go ahead, get whatever you want on the menu, you know it's all paid for." </p>
<p>Qwark licked his lips and grabbed the menu, shoving his nose in it greedily. While he was doing that, Nefarious fumbled with something under the table. He quickly stopped to bring his attention back to Qwark when he put the menu down. </p>
<p>"I'm getting the chicken strips and fries! I deserve to treat myself while enjoying the company of my lover~" </p>
<p>If Nefarious was capable of sweating he would be right now. He couldn't believe he was doing this. It was sappy and gross. Not that it already wasnt, he never thought he would be here of all things, having abandoned everything he thought he wanted before. But he had finally found something he wanted more than anything else. </p>
<p>After Qwark told the waiter his order, Nefarious cleared his throat to get his attention again. </p>
<p>"So uh, theres something that I would like to inquire uh...to you. A question really, yes! Yes it IS a question! And uh its..." </p>
<p>Qwark tilted his head in confusion. </p>
<p>Nefarious started shaking. "I-its very important s-so I wanted t-to ask you over a lovely dinner such as this..." </p>
<p>The ship made a loud creaking noise. Everyone stopped what they were doing. </p>
<p>"..." </p>
<p>Nothing? Okay. </p>
<p>"Anyyyways, as I was saying-" Nefarious tried to continue before he was cut off again. </p>
<p>The entire ship shook, sending people flying and knocking things over, including Qwark and Nefarious who were knocked out of their seats. Nefarious desperately tried to reach out to something that got knocked out of his hand that had rolled onto the floor. </p>
<p>"NO! I NEED THAT!" The robot shouted. </p>
<p>Qwark shook himself off as he stood up. He immediately helped his boyfriend up, who was still looking in the direction of that thing he dropped. </p>
<p>"What in galaxies name was that?" Qwark asked. He then looked over to the thing on the floor that Nefarious lost. </p>
<p>"Hey uh, what is that?" </p>
<p>Nefarious looked at him, panicked. </p>
<p>"That? Its, uh-" </p>
<p>The ship shook once more. </p>
<p>Over the intercom, a voice spoke. </p>
<p>"This is your captain speaking, we're going to experience some turbulence as I try to steer us away from the giant monster, please remain calm and hang on because HOLY SH-" </p>
<p>A weird trumpeting roar sounded, reverberating throughout the ship.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'm sorry for the wait but I was *aol dial up noise*</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>